MY CANCER JOURNEY
What Now?
I ended my last blog in a sense of frustration with the medical system in America but also trying to be hopeful knowing that my God had a reason for putting up a road-block for me. And I was right on both emotions!
No need to waste more time chatting about the brokenness of the medical system. I cannot change an entire country’s issue in a blog post. But what I can do is control the thoughts and emotions that are within my brain and in my surroundings. Let’s chat about that:
You know what the most powerful word in life is? CHOICE
We are surrounded by choices every minute of every day. Choices can bring life and positivity or they can bring destruction and demise. I work very hard to choose positive thoughts and keep my mind in a positive space. That was difficult to do when it seems like everything is fighting against you. That is when I learn to heavily rely on my Faith and the Word to uplift and encourage me. I have seen that sustain me more than ever this past week.
Joshua 1:9 says “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
This was written about the Israelites going across the Jordan River and into the Promised Land. What a scary time it was for them. I can’t imagine what it was like to spend forty years believing what God promised but stressing about how it was going to happen. But I can imagine what it feels like to know that my God wants me healed and well and the medical system putting up roadblocks to hinder that process. Not really the same but the same sentiment.
I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that my God has my back. I know this because He has proven it to me time and time again.
In my prayer request on my last post, I mentioned that I believed there was a reason for the hiccups in my path to treatment and I was correct.
So last Monday, April 8th, I had my surgery to put in my chemo port. There were a few issues that I outlined earlier, but overall the surgery seemed to go well.
I had never had a surgery like this before, so I really didn’t know what to expect the healing process to look like. My incisions looked hideous right after removing the bandages. I even had the thought of “This guy is supposedly one of the best surgeons in Tulsa and his incisions look like this?!?!” But I just went on with life.
I went on with life as my chest and neck began to get more and more red and inflamed by the day. Then the itching started and the rash grew. Finally I listened to Paul and messaged my doctor through MyChart. That was Tuesday night.
First thing Wednesday morning, I got a call from his office and detected a sense of urgency in the voice of the girl on the phone. The doctor wanted to see me as soon as I could get there. Still not thinking much of it, I was at the doctor’s office within the hour.
I entered the office and the PA began my exam. Within seconds, the surgical doctor busted into the room rather abruptly and squeezed in next to the PA to look at the incisions. The look on his face quickly went from angst to relief. “Whew. Your port looks good. It seems you are just having an allergic reaction to the glue or the stitches.”
He went on to explain that upon my description, he was afraid that we would be heading into emergency surgery to remove my port but upon exam, he was confident that it was just fine. A bit more questioning and we are now 95% certain that I am allergic to dermabond. Not only was this reaction pretty severe, but I often react negatively to band-aids and cannot use Saniderm after my tattoos due to pretty nasty reactions.
Antibiotics, Steroid Cream, and some pretty nasty antiseptic soap that burns like ghost peppers on your skin.
I am three days out from this appointment and things are going in the right direction.
Now let’s circle back to the first of this post.
Last week I was pissed. Angry at the medical system and the hoops we were having to jump through and changes we were having to make.
BUT GOD…
God KNEW I wasn’t ready to put literal POISON into my body because He knew my body wasn’t well.
God KNEW that the Co-Share was not going to be able to sustain all of our medical expenses.
God KNEW!
So here we are, Monday April 22nd. On Friday, we got word that our insurance should be approved today (fingers crossed) and our policy number will be coming very quickly after that. It shouldn’t take too long for the hospital and insurance to approve the treatment plan because we know all my doctors are in network. Should all go as planned, my chemo treatments will start on Tuesday, April 30th. I’m ready! I’m ready to get started so it can be done.
And because I know I have an AWESOME and supportive community, and I know so many of you will feel helpless in this fight of mine, these are ways to you can help us:
- Please keep me and Paul in your prayers. I will list a specific prayer request on each post so you know exactly what we are believing for in each bit of this journey.
- I have made an Amazon Wishlist with several items that would be helpful and loved. You guys have spoiled me rotten and most items have been taken care of. Most of what is left is good healthy and organic snacks. These can be somewhat pricey to be purchasing over and over, but will also be a great help to have on hand. There are items at all price points. You can view it by clicking the link at the bottom of this post.
- Since I am on a pretty restricted diet, a mealtrain would be difficult. There are a few organic/vegetarian restaurants nearby that Paul or a friend could grab food from. If you want to donate money for those occasions, my cashapp is $JamiSullins or Venmo is @Jami-Sullins
- Those Organic and Whole foods are EXPENSIVE and not what our budget is used to seeing. Whole Foods, CostCo, or Sprouts Market gift cards would sure come in handy.
Please understand, we are not asking for you to spend any money, but I also know that many of you have the Lord’s gifts of hospitality and caregiving, so I wanted to provide ways you could help.
Number One! We have GOT to get this skin rash/hives/whatever under control. Not only is it miserable, but not a good idea to start chemo if I am still dealing with it. I am so ready to start treatment, so please please please pray that God’s healing hand will be on my neck, chest, and upper arms.
Secondly, please continue to pray for our paperwork and every hand that touches it. We need it to be processed smoothly and efficiently so that we can get started.
Lastly, I hate feeling nauseous. I dealt with a sick tummy for my entire pregnancy with Mackenzie and it was miserable. I can handle losing my hair. No worries about being tired-I love a good nap. But I am terrified of always being sick. Please pray that once I start chemo that I will not have any nausea.
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